If like me you have bought every Grand Theft Auto game just because of the hype, played it for an hour and found them all to be extremely dull with terrible controls then you need to avoid the internet around 4pm today.
With that that in mind I have selected seven things to do rather than get sucked in to the GTA hype (again).
1. HEARTY! The Nathan Hale High School (yes, really) will be concluding its “Nick of Time Foundation’ heart screenings. If you’re quick you might be able to slip on the end of the queue and get your ticker checked out and get some top tips on beating the Chimera.
2. SPORTY! TJ Warren, a 5 star forward from Durham will be deciding what college to go to around 4pm today. TJ is said to be favouring NC State with a source saying they are confident he will be joining them. Stay tuned to the Pack Insider website to this important sporting news. Good luck TJ!
3. NOM! Patricks Pub & Eatery his holding its weekly Family Night, starting at 4pm today with discounts for families and double Pub Club Points! We recommend the roast Sirloin rotisserie special.
4. POETIC! Book your tickets for The Ledbury Poetry Festival fund-raising bash before 4pm as today is the first day of general admission booking. With Roger Lloyd Pack (a.k.a. Trigger from Only Fools & Horses) performing extracts of Shakespeare and mince pies, it’s bound to sell out fast.
5. PRESIDENTIAL! TSA readers who are also Presidents with the Women’s Institute can toddle off to a ‘Presidents’ Meet and Greet social event’ in which you can chat and share your experiences in a relaxed and friendly atmosphere. Rumour has it that after tea and scones the ladies have a bit of a knees up to Chase & Status.
6. TOPICAL! Jump on the first working Trolleybus in Athens this afternoon. The bus workers have been holding a general conference meeting to decide about protest actions against the ‘labour reserve’ measure that will send people home with only 60% of their income. People outside Greece already know of these measures and call it ‘paying tax’.
7. TASTY! Nip down to Warwick Student Union to applaud the winner of their Bake Off. Participants could win a £20 Amazon voucher. Anyone who enters must pass the strict cake requirements as posted on the Warwick Student Union website.
• Cake must be of a fair size (15 small potions as a guideline)
• Cake must be tasty.
I hope these events can provide sufficient distraction from the GTA hype machine, as extra protection I suggest covering your ears at 4pm and singing “la la la laaaa can’t hear you” very loudly.