Zombies are gross. Do you know what else is gross? Sexual objectification of women. Or men, for that matter. In fact, sexual objectification is pretty disgusting, no matter who you’re objectifying. If there is a scale for how offensive sexual objectification of different things can be, I’d put corpses quite far along the scale. Right out towards “very” on the disgust-o-meter.
I mean, objectifying women and men should denote you as a sleazy pervert who is destined to remain forever alone with naught but your own sweaty digits and perhaps a crusted sports sock for comfort on the cold, dark evenings. Objectifying a woman or man who has clearly been deceased for some time should put you on a register.
Videogames objectify women quite a lot, and occasionally men too. The latest videogame to do that is this one. But the people who want you to buy this videogame aren’t willing to settle for regular, icky pervert status that many other videogames purveyors would be comfortable attaining. No, the people who want you to buy this videogame are hanging their hat right on that special perverts peg by the door to the dungeon. They think you want some decomposing objectification.
You see, this is one of many modern games that feature zombies. It’s kind of like Dead Rising or Dead Rising 2 with some nods, stylistically, to the many incarnations of The Walking Dead. There’s even tones of Left 4 Dead and its sequel in there. This game features the over-the-top style that many might associate with Romero’s Living Dead series of movies, with elements of the self-awareness of the genre seen in films like Zombieland, Sean of the Dead and others. But all of that heritage isn’t important because this game has got boobs in it.
The people marketing the game are very keen that you know about the boobs. They’ve issued a Collector’s Edition which will cost almost a hundred pounds, in which you get a hand-painted resin statue that features some boobs. In fact, the resin statue features more boobs than arms or legs or eyes or lips or class or decency. It’s basically all boob. Most importantly, it seems, these are rare boobs.
By paying almost a hundred pounds for the special Collector’s Edition of this upcoming zombie game you can have twelve inches of rock hard, hand caressed resin that looks a bit like a bad boob job and a tacky bikini wrapped around a decaying torso.
Now, that’s gross.