The Tetris Movie Becomes A Trilogy

Tetris, a game about blocks falling from the sky and being placed in lines, has no story but that hasn’t stopped Hollywood planning not one, but three movies about the game.

Empire spoke to Larry Kasanoff who is in charge of the movie and asked him if the rumours of a trilogy had any weight.

“That’s correct,” confirmed Larry “and purely because the story we conceived is so big. This isn’t us splitting the last one of our eight movies in two to wring blood out of the stone. It’s just a big story.”

“We’re not going to have blocks with feet running around the movie,” he adds, “but it’s great that people think so. It sets the bar rather low!”

Whilst game-to-movie adaptions have been poor at best, the ones where there has been no plot to begin with – Battleship, Pixels – have been utter, utter garbage. Will Tetris buck the trend? Why am I am even bothering to ask that, no it won’t.

Source: Empire

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News Editor, very inappropriate, probs fancies your dad.

9 Comments

  1. I don’t remember the game even having a basic backstory so a trilogy sounds really promising.

    • I think it was something to do with Ian Dury’s band members trying to build a wall using their heads.

      • It’s a wonder how “Sex and Drugs and ‘butt that wall” never made it onto the soundtrack. ;)

  2. Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it.

    Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it. Please don’t do it.

    Please.

  3. They make movies about anything now a days. I wonder if I could sell my ripped shoe story, that could make quiet a good story but rather than a trilogy, let’s do a prequel to the trilogy about how the shoe ripped

    • Or about how the shoe was born…

  4. Honestly, which company would have listened to this pitch and thought ‘Yeah, that sounds like it will be successful’?
    And then to make it into a trilogy is even more insane!

    • There’s two lines of thought here: either they have so much money sloshing around Hollywood that they can afford to waste it on crap ideas like this (and making a mockery of their “piracy is really hurting us” argument in the process); Or they’re so bereft of ideas that they’ll take anything which comes along… So there is hope for JustTaylorNows shoe story above!!

  5. Ah, Tetris. I remember it being applauded for it’s strong story. Remember when Yellow and Red were mortal enemies? Remember the epic duel between Long and Short? Remember when Big Block revealed himself to be the father of Solid Block? Liquid Block was rather annoyed. Solidus Block became President. Raiden Block happened.

    Remember when erm….

    i ran out of stuff to make up as Tetris has no story.

    OF ALL THE GAMES.
    You do this.

    It’s freaking Tetris! It has no story. Meaning, it is very hard to fuck up but it has no story.

    NOTHING!

    N
    O
    T
    H
    I
    N
    G!

    How!?

    How can you pad out nothing for a trilogy!?

    I mean, how!?

    At least, with Battleship, there was potential. Granted, Micheal Bay turned it into Battleships vs Aliens and it kinda was crap. But battleships vs battleships is a good concept for any film.

    Here?

    It’s nothing!

    THEre IS NOTHING!

    I best go make me breakfast and a coffee.

    Tetris, a film.

    I knew hollywood was running out of ideas but Tetris?

    That sounds like something i would throw into the community round up as a joke.

    Freaking Tetris!?

    TETRIS!?

    HELLO!?

    ANYONE!?

    TETRIS!?

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