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Review

Crash Bandicoot Scented Candles Review

Scent from heaven.

After a short delay in production the must-have gaming accessory of the year has finally arrived: the Official Crash Bandicoot Crash Scented Candle Triple Pack! Created by Numskull, these three candles are designed to enhance your Crash Bandicoot: N-Sane Trilogy gaming experience by wafting smells of the jungle around your home. Thankfully the candle’s scents are based on the more delightful fragrances to be found in jungles rather than rotting vegetation and damp bandicoots, and are said to be inspired by the tropical aromas of Wumpa Island.

The candles are hand made, burn for 18-20 hours, and come in a sturdy case that can be re-used when the candle has burnt out. Each candle has a different ‘crate’ design taken from the game and looks utterly gorgeous, although they are something of luxury item as they cost £29.99 for a pack of three.

After extensive smell testing, here’s what you can expect from each candle:

TNT – Pomegranate

This sweet and floral fragrance explodes in your face like a bowl of cheeky kittens, with hints of spring blossoms, fruits of the globe, and gentle cuddles. We recommend this candle for when you need to relax after a hard day’s work in a nice hot bath, preferably with a copy of Grazia and a glass or two of Pinot Grigio.

Nitro – Wild Clematis

Extravagantly botanical, this candle assures you that all is well in the world with a scent that is reminiscent of hugs from Grandma. Cleverly tropical, but with hints of Downton Abbey and the dividing barrier between rich and poor, this candle is like having a steam bath in pot-pourri whilst being massaged by a thousand Flamingos.

Crash Face – Ginger and White Lilly

Our favourite of the three candles, this smells like a Porn-Star Martini with hints of passion fruit and Ed Sheeran. A more masculine scent than the other candles, this one is perfect for gaming neanderthals who don’t want to fully embrace metrosexuality.

What’s Good:

  • Fruity and fragant
  • Delightful crate designs
  • Long burn time

What’s Bad:

  • A bit pricey
  • Not very butch

Gamers have long been portrayed as grunting men stuck in their parents basement, surrounded by cans of Mountain Dew and Cheetos. Placing these Crash candles around your man-cave will go along way to persuading any ladies that you do shower at least twice a week and could be worth a second date. Lady gamers, who already smell of floral bouquets and champagne, will find the soothing scents compliment their aura and will discover that the gentle glow a perfect way to relax after a hard day at the office.

Score: 8/10

Version Tested: Wax

10 Comments
  1. JustTaylorNow
    Member
    Since: Oct 2011

    Wait wait, did you guys just review candles?!

    Comment posted on 13/09/2017 at 13:36.
  2. MrYd
    Member
    Since: Mar 2011

    “Version Tested: Wax”

    Why did that bit amuse me the most?

    Are candle reviews going to be a regular thing now? I hope so.

    Comment posted on 13/09/2017 at 13:51.
    • Stefan L
      Community Team
      Since: May 2009

      I mean… Numskull have also announced Destiny candles, so we’ll let you know what wormspore and glimmer smell like when those are released.

      Comment posted on 13/09/2017 at 16:09.
      • MrYd
        Member
        Since: Mar 2011

        I vaguely remember that vital bit of candle news. I think I commented that I was glad they were Mars and Venus scented and the game never visits Uranus.

        But yes. You must review those candles too.

        It seems they also do a Resident Evil 7 candle. It’s “horror-scented”, which seems unwise.

        Comment posted on 13/09/2017 at 16:50.
  3. double-o-dave
    Member
    Since: Nov 2008

    I don’t suppose there’s any Peach Beach Splash scented candles available?

    Comment posted on 13/09/2017 at 14:20.
  4. dave87fez
    Member
    Since: May 2011

    I’d like one, but I have some safety concerns. I’ve read reports that the green one will violently explode if given the slightest touch, whereas the red one isn’t much better (although apparently with that one you get a few seconds to run and hide before it goes off).

    Comment posted on 13/09/2017 at 14:52.
  5. TSBonyman
    Member
    Since: Dec 2009

    They sound wick-ed. I’ll get my coat.

    Comment posted on 13/09/2017 at 15:31.
    • ron_mcphatty
      Member
      Since: Sep 2008

      You need to be scent home.

      Comment posted on 13/09/2017 at 17:38.
  6. Unterred
    Member
    Since: Oct 2009

    BEST REVIEW EVER! More please😄

    Comment posted on 14/09/2017 at 06:42.
  7. Sammy
    Member
    Since: Oct 2016

    That’s not what those TNT and Nitro crates look like! Licensing problems? ;)

    Comment posted on 17/09/2017 at 10:26.

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