What Do Developers Eat?

So, the other day I sneaked out of TSA Towers whilst Nofi was busy re-designing the site.  If there’s one thing that makes being near Nofi unbearable it’s when he’s trying to coax CSS compliance out of IE.  I was on SwearWordsDefined.Com trying to understand what he was saying before deciding it was time to leave.

I figured I’d pay a visit to an old friend at Sellafield, a lovely chap, nicknamed The Troll for obvious reasons.  I arrived in time for lunch, so we headed to the onsite cafe where I asked him what he’d recommend to eat.

“Fission chips,” The Troll said.

I spent five minutes trying to order that while the mutated Geek Squad in the queue behind me sniggered.  Finally, I ordered a ham sandwich – made from locally grown produce, which terrified me – and we sat down to eat.

“Well then,” The Troll began, “do you really think this website of yours will be successful?”

“Isotope so,” I said, getting my own back.  I then subdued my still-kicking sandwich and ate it, no biting or chewing, trusting my stomach acids to kill it for me.

And then it struck me.  Which was a surprise given that I thought it was in my stomach, so I chowed down again and eventually got it under control.

And then it struck me: What sort of food do they serve at your favourite PS3 developers’ offices?

Well, I did some research so you don’t have to.

At SCEE’s canteen all the food is out-of-date, presumably due to delivery delays.

At SCEA they offer the latest in food, at recession-friendly prices, all before the rest of the world.

Free Radical’s cafe serves up anti-oxidant laden fruit and veg.

Insomniac’s office grub is an all-day buffet.

At Media Molecule they have tiny build-your-own food called LBPs – LittleBigPizzas – which you make before they Popit in the oven to cook.

EA’s catering facility orders the same as the year before and hopes no one notices.

Polyphony Digital’s kitchen runs like a well-oiled machine and offers an exhaustive range of food to fuel the workforce.

Rockstar serve whatever you put on your rider first thing in the morning.

Evolution provide different coloured pills containing the nutritional equivalent of a well balanced meal.

Guerilla offers a primarily vegetarian menu, with the odd ant or termite delicacy on special occasions.

It doesn’t matter what Naughty Dog serve, it all gets eaten and then the staff go begging for more.

But the most astonishing find was this:

Fallout 3 developers Bethesda serve up, you won’t believe this, Fission Chips.

And now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to try and pass a live ham sandwich…