Sony Smacktalk April Edition

Firstly, I would like to point out that this is totally unconfirmed. The ‘press release’ was sent to one website only, but, what with the gaming media being what it is, many sites are running with it. I would say that taking your forefinger and your thumb to some salt granules would be a good exercise whilst reading the rest of this story.

The remainder of this article will be conducted in the style of the popular tabloid, The Daily Mail. Enjoy the overblown and out of proportion inaccuracies the paper is famed for.

Yes, the verbal brawlers are at it again, this time head of Sony Computer Entertainment’s American branch, John Koller, issued a tirade of abuse towards the popular child’s toy and interactive cookery book, the Nintendo DSi. Clearly frustrated by Sony’s apparent pitiful sales of the PSP the Sony executive lashed out saying that the “kid’s toy” was aimed at kids and not adults. Koller said that Nintendo “aren’t going to reach anyone beyond the ‘kids’ market they’ve always relied on.”

This outburst, unprovoked by the child and soccer mum favorite Nintendo, was a response to the newly released DSi, a newer, shinier version of the ‘clam shell’ console. The Sony PSP, a direct rival to the DSi has been receiving poor sales of late clocking up a measly 50 million sales worldwide.

Koller goes on to mention the strong lineup of PSP titles due out next year including a Mario Kart copy MotorStorm and the Sonic-a-like LittleBIGPlanet, the PS3 version of which included voice over from tv’s favorite intellectual homosexual, Stephen Fry. Koller is also keen to shout about number of violent and adult games also due next year with titles such as Assassin’s Creed and Final Fantasy, a date simulator, it’s clear why Sony are struggling to compete.

Our resident games adviser had this to say: “With the DSi you can play Petz and Nintendogs but Sony are really trying to tempt that market away with the lure of teen sensation Hannah Montana and a new colour. This will surely secure their place in the mobile games market.”

Officials and parents are obviously concerned with Sony’s promotional push as the PSP is a complicated piece of technology. The lack of a touch screen and seizure warning will be baffling to most and without knowledge of the product parents will find it hard to recognise predatory software.

There was no word form either Sony or Nintendo as we went to press due to a lack of telephone number in our address book.


Via: kotaku and edgeonline