TSA Fixes: SingStar

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It’s a weekly occurrence for Alex to bellow out a few tunes in a karaoke fashion. On the odd occasion that he actually puts down the hairbrush, slip the SingStar disc into his PS3 and pick up a microphone that doesn’t glow like a Christmas tree, he has a wail of a time; so much so that everyone in TSA Towers can hear him night and day. Even with such a gem like SingStar on our trusty system, surely it can’t be perfect?

1. Are you drunk yet?

Never before has a game required you to be drunk before playing. Even Alex enjoys a refreshing Gin and Tonic before exercising his vocal chords, as lets face it, no one willingly sings in karaoke unless you can actually sing or are constantly squinting to read the words through your beer-goggles. SingStar is therefore a unique title; Broadband connection required for online features, SingStar Microphones and SingStar USB Converter required, suitable for 1-8 players, requires players to be pissed.

2. The joy of wires

A group of drunken friends in one room, singing along to another Top 40 hit, microphone at one end, beloved PS3 at the other, what could possibly go wrong? Damn those wires, damn them to hell! Why can’t we just have wireless microphones? Wait, we can get them now? Fantastic. Well maybe make them microphones that make me sing in-tune?

3. Why not add…?

Whilst we’re changing the peripherals a bit, why not add in a couple of guitars, maybe a drum kit; we could have BandStar – the entire band experience. Oh right. Well how it is that Guitar Hero has progressed past the original set-up (to further and improve the experience), whilst this supposed party game still limits us to only two vocalists at a time? Why can’t we sing as a quartet to ‘Mamma Mia’ or have a trio Tom Jones impersonators attempting to hit the notes in ‘I Believe In A Thing Called Love’? You are meant to be a party game, let more people play at once!

4. You want me to sing how high?

As a reasonably vocally deep-toned male, my voice is not particularly suited to a glass-shattering rendition of ‘I Don’t Feel Like Dancing’. Now, I know that there is a variety of male-led songs on a couple of the discs and via the SingStore, but I want more. More Rock ballads to scream out, perhaps a touch of stuff from lesser known bands, give me more Alternative, more Rock, more Metal . In fact, Sony, just ask and I’ll pass on a list of very suitable songs for you to add to the ever-growing track-list.

5. Scrolling lyrics

There comes a time when, either by random luck or by a particular idiot thinking it would be ‘fun’ to give it a go, that the face-meltingly fast song finally gets chosen. You know the one, where the vocalist doesn’t take a breath for about 2 minutes? If you’re going to shoot lyrics at me faster than any normal human can read them, at least scroll along to let me know a couple of milliseconds prior.  And speaking of lyrics: “The Reason”, where the hell is it? Yes, I can ace Hoobastank’s emotional lay, it was the one track I was awesome at on the PlayStation 2 version of SingStar, so I want it back!

What would you change with SingStar?