Dead or Alive 5 Plus Boob Jiggling Mode Is Just Bizarre

Peter Chapman 20 Comments

We’ve covered the breast-jiggling weirdness of Dead or Alive 5’s Vita update before. For those of you not keeping up to speed with the best that videogames have to offer with regards to the dynamic properties of boobs, here’s a quick recap.

DoA 5 Plus features the inclusion of an unlockable mode which allows you to use the touch screen to make the extremely well-endowed stars of the game bounce, wobble and generally undulate around. To me, it seems very weird and a bit… icky. Well, that was when I thought it was a mode included for some grubby pervs to find some form of titillation in it. Having seen this video, I realise it’s a comedy thing. I mean, this isn’t really how breasts should move, that would be agony for the woman involved.

Here’s the video, click through the link to see it.

I still think this is very strange, slightly embarrassing (for all concerned) and, if you find yourself aroused by it I think you probably need therapy. But at least it’s obviously not meant to look in any way realistic.

In answer to the (totally justified) accusations of misogyny that this will draw, I’d like to encourage Tecmo Koei and Team Ninja to patch in a realistically modelled, oversized cock and balls that jiggle about when you tap and grow gradually larger if you stroke the screen tenderly. I mean, if we’re going to sexually objectify we should at least be fair about it.

Who really wants this crap?

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20 Comments

  1. Why would anyone want to perv over this when there is mountains of free porn all over the internet?, the good stuff aswell

    • Hang your head in shame sir
      .
      .
      .
      .
      Where?
      ;-)

      • Pornhub and tube pleasure are pretty good, also cliphunter. Aint nothing wrong with a little smut now and then!

      • LOL!! I wasn’t being all that serious. :-)

      • Yeah I know lol

  2. and they said it wasn’t all about the sex any more.

    people demanded it, they said
    who demanded this?

    i agree though, if they let people play with the women’s breasts, then why can’t people play with the guys junk?

    in fact i think i had that idea when this was first mentioned.

    anyway, it wouldn’t appeal to me, but fair’s fair, right?

    or get Terry Crews in the next game and let people play with his chest.
    that would be hilarious. ^_^

  3. BOOOOIOIOIOINGGGG! *Beavis and Butthead reference*

  4. Need some kind of augmented reality feature where you can put the Vita flat on your face, and make noises as if you were rubbing your face into breasts, all whilst the Vita device rumbles furiously. At least you’d spot the kind of people who demanded this out in public.

  5. Dead or Alive is a okish fighter but its a shame its overshadowed by stuff like that.

  6. *Swing* (Wayne’s World)

  7. I’m not sure what they’re even trying to achieve but there we go. A bit pathetic and not something I’d want on my CV, that’s for sure.

    • I’d LOVE some tits on my Citroen ;p

    • Lol, I can see it now on a programmer’s resume:
      Worked on getting boobs to jiggle while touching and rubbing the touch screen.
      Sounds a bit like that person worked in the porn industry.

  8. Chill out people, its just a bit of harmless Benny Hill style comedy wobbly boobage. I’d have been more surprised if they hadn’t used the vitas touch or motion abilities in some way like this.

  9. So if i were to play DOA5’s boob mode, i would end up becoming SolidSteven:Rising. I can do that for free. ;-) Who on earth will buy this for virtual tits? Just who? Also, i doubt people will use their fingers to touch the boobs and instead use their snakes. ;)

  10. While I dont find it particulary amusing I dont understand why people gets upset by this. The breasts have been a main feature in this game forever, and im sure a chunk of its sales comes from (and the game developers know it) hormones-gone-crazy male teens that giggle when playing it.

    If all games were like this id get upset too, but with all the choices out there, they can turn the game into a wrestling porn game that i wouldnt care at all.

    would a giant cock sell the game more? I doubt so, the day it does, im sure they will have no problem in including it.

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