Man’s Bum Falls Apart Whilst On Toilet, Video Games Are Blamed

A man from south-east China has been rushed to hospital as his rectum fell out of his bumhole. According to reports, doctors are suggesting that the rectal prolapse occurred as the man had been sat on the toilet for thirty minutes playing video games.

At least, that’s what the headline on the Daily Mirror tells us. The Daily Mail, the bastion of quality journalism, goes for a more accurate headline explaining that he was playing games on his mobile phone. Back to the Daily Mirror’s report (complete with typo):

Doctors diagnosed him with rectal prolapse, which is when the rectum losesits attachment to the body. It was still attached to his rear and medics said they believed the condition could have been happened because he had been sat on the toilet for half-an-hour, playing video games.

Interesting journalism there, and also from the Daily Mail who report that a “mysterious ball-sized lump had fallen out of his anus”. Mmm lovely, I hope your not eating anything at the moment.

So, man in shock because bum fell apart due to video games! Except, of course, it is *takes of shades, looks to camera* a load of arse.

Read a little further on and we discover the man “has suffered from rectal prolapse since he was just four”, so there was nothing “mysterious” about this and it nothing to do with video games.

Still, makes for a great headline, eh? Have a nice weekend!

Source: Daily Mirror / Daily Fail

Written by
News Editor, very inappropriate, probs fancies your dad.

5 Comments

  1. My mum always told me video games were bad for me!

  2. Hah, wonderful! This article has throne me into fits of laughter, although crap for the poor guy involved. I wonder what he was playing, Sky Rim? Arssassins Creed? Metal Rear Solid? Popoolus? Red Alert? Total Annihilation? Angry Turds? Wee Sports? Deus Excrement? Splatoon? Flow? Volume? Burnout? Wipeout? Tearawanus? Shadow from a Colossus? Dead or Alive?

    • Haha brilliant – you win everything!

    • As he was on his phone, Angry Turds, or may I suggest – Splash of the Pans

  3. Well seeing as they use squatter toilets in China it may have put more pressure on it rather than being sat on a western toilet.

    Or maybe I’m just talking out of my arse.

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