ESRB Rates Nier, Quotes Deep Cleavage

Fountain of unintentional humour, the Electronic Software Ratings Board, has gone and done it again. Remarking on its “deep cleavage”, Nier has received an expected Mature rating by the classification body.

The entry also gives us a more by-the-numbers look into what Nier is actually about. And considering the confusion thanks to Gestalt and Replicant (two games, both Nier, same universe, different protagonists), the information is a godsend.

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The setting: a post-apocalyptic world. The plot: you play a grief-stricken father who must find a cure for his daughter who is infected with a “mysterious, magical disease.” There’s mention of puzzles, travelling on foot (and boat!) all the while dispensing of “otherwordly creatures along the way.”

The Mature classification stems from the “[…] cinematic cutscenes […] also depict humans and creatures getting stabbed, impaled, crushed, or destroyed.” Ah, impaling. Never a favourite of the censors. Of course, the “dense fountain-like cascades of blood (along with the language) factor highly into the Mature rating: blood will spray, cascading and arching—sometimes in slow-motion.” didn’t help. When it comes to the profanity, expect “f**ks, “a*sholes,” “bullsh*ts,” and “sh*t hogs”. We don’t know what a sh*t hog is, but we can’t wait to find out.

So we have cleavage, impaling and enough cuss-words to turn a sailor blue. What must really have dispelled any chance of a teen rating, however, is surely the hermaphrodite. Glen or Glenda “wears a revealing outfit that exposes most of the buttocks, in most of his/her scenes; depictions of jiggling breasts and deep cleavage are applied to various female characters as well.”

Mature it is then.

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