ESRB Smut Watch

Once again I have trawled the ratings description from the ESRB to give you a handy condensed guide on which games you should avoid to keep both mind and spirit pure. It is certainly not an excuse just have a titter at the ESRB’s superb descriptions.

We at The Sixth Axis abhor smut and suggest you avoid it all costs. If you are a filthy smut fiend please say a Hail Mary in the comments section below and we shall pray for you on Sunday when the Reverend Nofi leads us in eight hours of self-flagellation and worship.

This week features skirt lifting, large amounts of buttocks and Snake – and I can barely type this it’s so disusting –  Snake  goes.. gay. Eurgh. Dirty animal! Just the thought if such acts makes me vomit.*

• Sengoku BASARA Samurai Heroes – Some female characters wear revealing outfits that expose some cleavage; one character’s breasts jiggle slightly when she moves.
• Castlevania Harmony of Despair – Some female creatures (succubi and harpies) wear revealing outfits that expose a lot of cleavage; one enemy’s vacuum attack causes a heroine’s skirt to be rise up frequently.
• Hot Shots Tennis: Get a Grip –Some female avatars have tight bodysuits that depict moderate cleavage, and one line judge is described as “the seductive superlady” with a profile that asks, “How long before the court is mobbed by men wanting to steal a look?”
• Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker – Players can also engage in extra missions (“extra ops”) that involve dating either a male or female character: Players can take pictures of their female dates in bikinis, touch a character’s breasts, or lie on top of him or her on the beach. If players enter a cardboard box (“Love Pack”), a rustling motion and moaning sounds occur.
• Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D’s Decade Duels – Some of the cards depict female characters in somewhat revealing skin-tight clothing, including a winking nurse character in front of a background of hearts.
• Deathspank – The dialogue contains some mild sexual references such as “He says you are a psychotic dominatrix and not in the good way”; “Between the heart palpitations and the unchecked syphilis, it’s the least of my worries”;
• Tehra Dark Warrior –Tehra is depicted briefly in cutscene still images wearing an outfit that reveals a significant amount of cleavage. During gameplay, Tehra wears a thong-like costume that exposes large amounts of her buttocks.
• Bloody Good Time – Some female characters are depicted in bikinis, low-cut clothing, bunny outfits, and showgirl costumes that expose a lot of cleavage. A movie set displays a call sheet that details a bedroom scene, with the text “Please Note: As this scene involves nudity, ONLY the involved actors, the assigned camera op and the director should be present.”

Source: ESRB

*Note for those of you who are new around here: I am a fully practising homsexual. This is humour, not homophobia. I love c*ck.