‘Nintendo 3DS is game for a barf’ is the puntastic and completely inaccurate headline in today’s The Sun. Obviously a bit riled that they were caught out yesterday for exaggerating the problems with the new Nintendo console the ‘newspaper’ has called in medical experts to substantiate their claims.
‘Their man’ Lee Price, 22, played Street Fighter and Pro Evolution Soccer in four 30-minute slots with a ten minute break between each play. For the first thirty minutes of play (during which he sat on a sofa) Lee seemed to be fine and the Doctor agreed. The next session Lee stood up and the Doc noted ‘slight nystagmus, where your eyes race from side-to-side’.
For the third half hour Lee played the game whilst ‘walking idly down the street’. Lee’s pulse and blood pressure has risen, thus proving that the 3DS is having an effect and certainly not because Lee is a bit tubby and having to move. “If this was your resting rate, I’d recommend you saw a GP about high blood pressure,” says Doctor Carol.
It’s not his resting rate Carol, nothing to worry about, but well done The Sun for just slipping in the phrase ‘high blood pressure’.
The Sun does not report how many open manholes Lee fell in to whilst playing his 3DS, nor the amount of times he walked into a tree or got hit by a truck as he wasn’t paying attention whilst crossing the road. Surely these side effects of playing the 3DS whilst ‘walking idly down the street’ are far more serious?
For the final hour Lee is playing the 3DS in a car. Lee is feeling ‘very nauseated’ because his eyes are trying to focus on the 3DS whilst the car rumbles about. He has blood pressure of 140/84, pulse 85. “If this rate is sustained for a long period it could damage circulation. I think the break period needs to be significantly increased,” advises Doctor Carol.
The sun concludes with verdicts from both Lee and Carol.
LEE’S VERDICT: After two hours, it’s time to put it away.
CAROL’S VERDICT: Children should not be left to play on it for hours.
Excellent advice there, The Sun. Well done.
Skyfire
did they mention the number of car accidents while using the ds in a car , personally i need both hands the majority of the time while driving so would feel a bit nauseated too if i saw my death round ever corner.
Person678
Picture on the right – the result of a long night in Tuffcubs basement.
Tuffcub
It’s been pointed out on twitter it looks rather like Peter.
Person678
I love how we refer to him as ‘it’.
quinkill
I’m pretty sure staring at The Sun raises ones pulse and blood pressure, maybe they ned a warning for that too.
baggyg
I start to hyperventilate if I play after midnight
Tuffcub
Do you then make a cocoon and emerge as a reptillian scary creature? Na na na naaaa na na! < Theme from Gremlins
OneShotWook
I recently watched Machete whilst smashed on Tequilla,i think i may’ve killed someone.
R4U Eldave0
You f**ked with the wrong Mexican! :D
Roger
An interesting sidenote is that I’m a bit like Machete.
It’s true! I don’t text either.
OneShotWook
Lol bloody genius movie.
Amphlett
Check that double chin out in the photo on the left! I wonder why his heart rate and blood pressure shoot up when he takes a casual stroll…
Radiitz
The Guy in the picture on the right looks like he just had a blowjob from Gordon Brown.
OneShotWook
No he looks like he’s definatly experiencing something there,maybe being Clegged.
Sympozium
Camerorgasm?
hazelam
honestly, i’m still not sure if their article is a joke or not.
it just hit me this morning, fox news and the sun are both part of the same murdoch media empire, and suddenly it all makes sense.
OneShotWook
I’m with you here Hazelam,Carol the Doctors expert advice box at the end also warns of people not holding the device correctly might experience a cricked neck or headache.Good advice indeed especially for those who have never picked up and looked at anything ever,so moron tabloid nonsense or comedy genius? guess it doesn’t matter.
heedbaw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ColQqZ58uNY&feature=player_embedded#at=66
sweet, just as much comedy as the story itself
Charmed_Fanatic
i think its true to some extent as if you move, your eyes have to constantly adjust, however, i have no problems