Analyst Predicts Battlefield 3 Will Sell 100 Copies

[drop2]Analyst Crompton McFoster, of the renown Crimstalin, Moulder and Tacitus Associates, has predicted that EA’s Battlefield 3 will sell rather splendidly.

Citing initial sales of one hundred, with another 1,000 to follow in “another” period of time thereafter, McFoster seemed bullish about his predictions for EA’s flagship shooter.


The game, which leads EA’s assault on Activision’s Call of Duty franchise, will almost certainly sell more than their previous top seller for the year, FIFA 12. The football game has been said to have sold “more than I’ve had hot dinners” by several leading industry analysts with opening weekend figures sitting comfortably around the “shedloads, mate” mark.

If Battlefield 3 can live up to, or even exceed, these bold projections it will become the greatest selling game of this week and possibly even longer. A stunning achievement for EA who, as most of you will know, is just a two man team with a limited marketing budget, which operates from a spare bedroom in Dorset.

At the time of publication, McFoster (who also goes by the alias of Tomothy Olympustrip) was requesting ridiculous sums of money for his – admittedly on the money – analysis.  We’ve managed to negotiate him down to a pint.

We’ll reach out to EA for their sexy loving input.

This has been Crumdangle, seeking out stories that don’t exist…  for more ramblings on this particular matter, why not follow SPOnG’s Tim Smith on Twitter



  1. Love it!
    “shedloads, mate”

    • Yeah, goat love this one on his twitter – Breaking: “Sales of Modern Warfare 3 will at least double after the first unit is sold.”

  2. …do I want to know?

  3. 100 copies? Where per branch of GAME?

  4. Not really sure what to make of this… :S

  5. 100 copies?! That’s a ridiculous number. I don’t trust your sources, Bartholomew Crumdangle.

  6. Love it!

  7. I love you Bartholomew Crumdangle.
    Just waiting for the comments to explode now!

    • Crumdangle is perhaps the greatest investigative reporter of his generation!

  8. I don’t get it? Ummmm…

    • You’re not alone.

    • It took me awhile, but I think I get it now. You see this is a dream and Bartholomew Crumdangle is in a dream within a dream. But to understand what he’s talking about you have to go in a dream within a dream within a dream. There you shall find the answer to your questions…

      • So you need to get some firefighters, ’cause they have ladders and can move between layers of dreams.

    • What’s not to get? Clearly a lovely, absurd mickey take at all the analysts out there.

      • And a mighty fine one at that! I look forward to more Crumdangle in the future!

      • To be clear. I got what he was getting at (Getception!) but I really dind’t think it was funny at all. This must be the British humor people always keep telling me about. :)

  9. does this mean we have to sleep with someone from EA to play the game?

    • Don’t worry, there’s only two to choose from.

  10. Lol, he’s the new Michael Patcher.

    • Is that the guy responsable for all those “patches” I have to download everytime I start a game on my PS3?

    • To Michael!

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