News Snatch: Farting Orcs, Xbone And Dancing Pingwins

Greetings one and all, welcome to a brand new week of news starting with a game about Orcs that fart. Orc Attack: Flatulent Rebellion will be expelled (hah!) on to the PS3 and Xbox 360 this week and comes with four player local or online multiplayer and the ability to buff your fellow players with “The Fart of Healing”.

Yes, really.

Phil Spencer (not that one) has admitted that he was not “clever enough” to come up with nick-name Xbone.

“I don’t think you’ll see us running ads that say Xbone… but, yeah, it’s a clever use of the name,” he told Eurogamer.

The trademark registration for Half-Life 3 was a hoax. What a jolly jape that was, I bet someone is feeling incredibly pleased with themselves.

Luigi’s Mansion 2 might be getting an upgrade from 3DS to Wii U, or it might be someone pressed a button and put the game in the Wii U category at Newegg just to get a few more hits and sell a couple more games.

Maxis are exploring “the possibility of an offline mode” for SimCity. “An offline mode would have the additional benefit of providing room to the modding community to experiment without interfering or breaking the multiplayer experience,” they explain.

Maxis know what they are talking about having had plenty of expertise “breaking the multiplayer experience” when the game launched.

Quantic Dream co-CEO Guillaume de Fondaumiere discusses the differences between Beyond: Two Souls and Heavy Rain, the daunting scope of the story and his desire to wear a frilly skirt and dance the can-can round the Quantic Dream office.

That last bit may not be true.

Obvious news doo doo doo doo do-do, obvious news doo doo doo doo do-do, OBVIOUS! NEWS! Newsthatisobvious! A-bing-bong-bing-bong…

Lewis Ward, manager at research firm IDC has predicted sales of consoles will surge this Christmas. “It took me ages to work this out and do the graphs and stuff,” he did not say.

Meanwhile a developer has confirmed that Sony pay real cash for games that appear on the PlayStation Plus service.  “This is shocking news,” said a PlayStation gamer, “I always assumed Sony got the games for free, or at most a stroke of David Cage’s beard.”

A Kickstarter for Lilt Line Too has five days to run but it still rather short of cash, if you fancy helping out our chums from Different Cloth (Derrick The Deathfin) then click here.

Grand Theft Auto V has already outsold Grand Theft Auto IV in the U.K. The game has proven to be particularly popular with elderly gamers, “I just love shanking bitches,” said 76 year old Ethel Wainwright.
And Finally, another bonkers Japanese PS Vita advert, this time with pingwins.


  1. That VITA advert is awesome

    • Haha, it is, loved it!

      • Yeah gotta love crazy Japanese adverts!

  2. Crossbone is an (ugly as sin) skateboard grab, as THPS afficionados will know. Also, Lewis Ward sounds like a bellend.

  3. Loxe xbone. It sums up the console perfectly

  4. love

  5. I might actually buy SimCity if they introduce an offline mod, and I’m assuming everything’s been fixed now?

    • What? o0!

      • Owww, damn I watched the PSV ad a few times and forgot this News Snatch had something else xD!

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