With one thing and another, this week has been pretty rough for me. Actually, the past few weeks have been quite difficult. I’ve had very unreliable internet access and with the games release schedule being what it is and everyone else working so hard, I’ve felt like I’m letting people down.
I’ve missed being able to dip in and sort out news posts when Dan is busy. I’ve been almost entirely unable to do the features editing I do when Kris can’t get to it (not to mention the twice-daily “can you do images” emails he usually sends!) I’ve struggled with getting reviews out and keeping in touch with PR contacts. Some days, simply answering emails has been a struggle. I’ve tethered my iPhone (and destroyed my data plan!), bought awfully slow MiFi hotspots and generally struggled to keep myself vaguely connected so that the stream of content you’re used to is kept fairly regular while other people are travelling, partying and attending events in TSA’s name.
On top of that, my wife has been insanely busy in her own job. I’ve hardly seen her for over a week. And my dog hurt his back leg a month ago and needs to be constantly watched so he doesn’t undo the work that the ridiculously expensive surgery did to mend him. I’ve felt like it’s a constant struggle, trapped indoors almost constantly “dogsitting” and no matter how hard I try, I’m still letting people down. Missing typos in posts I edit, using the wrong images, not responding to emails quickly enough and making the wrong decisions on things. At a point it feels like nothing I do is good enough because the struggle people don’t see is obviously disregarded in the efforts people do.
I’m well aware that this is very much a series of what the glib commentators on Twitter like to call “first world problems”. I’m not vain enough to expect (or want) you to care. This little blog isn’t an attempt to get loads of comments sympathising (although if anyone wants to send me a little cake, I wouldn’t say no). What I want to say here is a simple “thank you”.
On Friday, teflon sent me a public reply via twitter that said I was “certifiable”. Apparently, he thought it was a bit mental that we were giving away so many prizes recently. I suppose it was quite a lot in a short period. The iPad competition is Gameloft’s thing so I can’t take credit for that. But we also had the GTAV speculation competition and gave a way some Amazon vouchers and then we had the Uncharted 3 competition where we gave away a copy of the game plus two £25 PSN vouchers. Those two, and the previous competition to win a copy of Forza 4 with the Microsoft Speed Wheel were all funded by the website or by me personally.
It didn’t occur to me until teflon’s comment on Friday that this might be considered generous. You might find that difficult to believe but up until that one lighthearted, throwaway comment, I hadn’t really thought about it as anything other than a kind of therapy.
You see, I’d been having a bad week or two and giving stuff away makes me feel better. I’d felt like I was letting people down and seeing people enthusiastic and happy made me feel better about myself and my perceived inadequacies. You were all unsuspecting therapists.
Being involved with TSA is really hard work sometimes. There’s such a volume of effort and stress that goes into supplying all of this that you visit in your hundreds of thousands every month. On top of that, we also have a much more interactive, closer relationship with our core community than anyone else I can think of. The little criticisms and comments that people make are magnified by the perception that the people making them are our friends, rather than just the market we serve, as they are on almost all other websites (whether they admit it or not).
It’s difficult for me to make that distinction and I think that’s part of why TSA feels more like a collective community than most sites. We certainly work harder than a lot of them, even the paid ones, our quality is greater than many and we put out more content than most. But this other aspect of actually, genuinely caring about the people who give back in the comments is, I think, fairly unique. And although it means that I take the criticisms more harshly than I should, it also means I can lean on you for your unknowing support.
Crocadillian
The community and effort put into this site is the main reason I visit it, and it’s pretty much the only site I visit. The coverage is excellent, you guys are as unbaised as someone humanly can be, and you have your hearts in the right place. Just keep going :D
RudeAwakening
What Peter and all the TSA staff have created here is truly an amazing site and community, and I applaud everyone’s hard work in keeping this site well above any other gaming site.
lenn117
We all love you Peter!! And TSA! Its because of articles like this and the competitions you guys run, the F1 competition and such, that I keep coming back. How you guys keep doing what you do and keep such a high standard is amazing to me. Im always happy to visit here and help out no matter how I can. Also hugs to both Peter and Roynaldo! Top blokes!
Sweetums
I’m a huge fan of TSA, and I can fully appreciate the huge amount of hard work and dedication put into a site like this! Keep at it, knowing that all of the readers are behind what you do!
Jen A
Aww :(
I know that feeling well.
In particular, I’ve felt like the last couple of weeks, I’ve had so much on that none of it has been done as well as it should have been!
Hope things calm down for you soon, your internet gets sorted and your dog feels better soon :) *hugs*
bacon_nuts
I’ve had a few bad weeks too recently. Especially when put right after the best part of my life so far (probably). It’s okay though, I hope things improve for you, and I really don’t mind if you are finding it difficult to help the site, because on here, the writers appear as people, instead of faceless names that churn out articles, and so I can understand that at times, other things are more important. And hey, even with you finding it difficult to find time for it, in my mind TSA is still by far the best gaming site about. p.s. i really do think it’s lovely the amount of comps you have, and the fact that you fund some of them yourself is really great.
Sympozium
Argh! these past weeks have been brutal, and its only getting more brutalier for me as I go on… (T.T)
Its always pleasure to visit Thesixthaxis, keeps getting better….. the effort and time put into it surely would be crueling. Hope the situation improves, a broadband that doesn’t work or barely is pure evil <.<
MayContainEvil
Hope things start to work themselves out for you soon, you’re responsible for giving us pretty much the best place on the internet to enthuse, whine and rage about not just gaming but life in general. We really cannot thank you enough.
Shaggy2Dope
I’ve read similar articles on this site from other TSA staff members pertaining to this particular subject and it honestly breaks my heart every time i read them knowing that i can’t do or say anything to make that certain person feel better. What makes it worse is that most of the staff and members on TheSixthAxis reside in an entirely different continent from where i am. I’m just one person who visits this site dailyand i don’t voice my comments that often but i can’t express how much these articles touch my heart. You’re work does NOT go unappreciated nor the work of all the other staff on this site. I thank God for giving all of you here the gift for creating not just a wonderful website, but a family as well, so to speak. THANK YOU ALL! :)
KeRaSh
I know how it feels. We’ve all been there before but it gets better. It always does. You’ve not let us down. You couldn’t if you tried. :P