Durex Announce Sexy Time Internet Underwear And Smartphone App

Hang on, just checking the calender.. yup, it’s Friday. Generally, we like to think Friday fun is something we do on TSA – because Friday is the longest day of the week while you all waste time at work, waiting for the weekend. But plenty of the news-makers are meeting us half way on this.

So then, Durex have announced Fundawear, underwear you can control via a smartphone app which let’s you play sexy time games across the Internet. The project lets long distances lovers “tease, tickle and tantalise even when apart” and Durex seem to think they are onto something.


“After the laughter had stopped, we knew it was going to be an awesome project. People will want this,” said the technical director of the project, Ben Moir.

The project connects saucepots together via an Amazon server so perhaps they can pick up a copy of Fifty Shades Of Grey whilst they are buzzing their partners unmentionables.

Fashion, gaming and sex, I don’t think I’m ever going to write a more perfect news item, I can die a happy man.



  1. I remember reading about a USB powered vibrator so you could just remotely connect to said computer and ramp up the voltage. None of this pathetic, external touching nonsense. Get in there!

  2. 50 shades of Brass Eye.

  3. I’m sure it would be great until one of the motors overheats and burns your nads off.
    Seriously though, I really cant see this getting anywhere.

  4. She’s cute. :)
    However, I’m sure this will be used for self pleasuring 99% of the time.
    The other 1% will raise headlines like “Durex servers got hacked, caused thousands of orgasms and stiff nipples”.

    • This might be a bit weird but I really love the idea of a mass hacking – usually considered a very negative thing – that just brings people up to the vinegar strokes.

      “Using my hacking skills for stealing identities and bank account numbers? No, I just want to make fifteen thousand people all climax at once!”

      • And the hackers will consider themselves to be the Robin Hoods of the internets. :P

    • The other 1% will raise headlines like “Durex servers got hacked, caused thousands of orgasms and stiff nipples”.
      lol !!!

  5. Serioulsy have you seen the amount of vibrator apps on the martket place..just type vibrator in the search bar *apparently*

    • No i have not.

      Also: You dirty perv.

  6. Smartphone schmartphone, this is where it’s at:

    • This was a great read. Cheers for that. I imagine his missus was not best impressed after that!

  7. Is it wrong that i want it to get hacked just so thousands will end up climaxing at the wrong time or had several incidents?

    I really hope TSA will not do a video review of this when it is released. I wonder how many patches it will require on day one? ;)

    • We should ask Willington to review it like the Justin Bieber app.

  8. Haha, it’d be like a nation of pile sufferers. Unexpected tingles down there at the most compromising times will probably cause sudden hip jerk movements that would have to be explained away as the Hem cream not working. ” Damn they’ve dropped again!” :P

  9. Paedophile’s dream.

Comments are now closed for this post.