Review: Monsters (Probably) Stole My Princess!

We’ve all (probably) played the mini version of Monsters (Probably) Stole My Princess!, and I’ve (probably) made this joke thousands of times. That doesn’t prevent the joke from being as good as the first time, however. And, in the same way, the release of Monsters on Xbox Live Indie Games doesn’t prevent the game from being as good as it was the first time round (probably). Anyway, enough with the uncertainty; we can be very certain that Monsters is a great game, but what is it that makes it so special?

You play as a character known only as “The Duke”, as he sets out on a journey to save his Princess from the monsters that have (most certainly) stole her. It takes a combination of stylish moves, awesome combos and a good method of quickly disposing of the evil monsters to save the Princess from her disastrous fate. There are six unique levels in the story mode and you’re driven to play them until you become the best monster hunter and Princess saver in the Universe with Score Attack mode.

To catch the monster, you have to jump from platform to platform and the only way is straight up. The controls are delightfully simple; you press A to jump and you can tap it twice for a double jump and, if you’re feeling adventurous, you can point The Duke towards the side of the screen for a wall jump. The Duke can perform other moves for your pleasure, such as looking up to see the monster he is intent on destroying, dropping down through platforms or even running from side to side!


The main objective is to defeat those fiendish monsters by double jumping into them as they try to make their escape; you’ll have to do this three times to ensure your victory is as sweet as possible. As you chase the monster, numbers will pop out of the platforms. Well, they will if you don’t jump on the same platform twice or fall down. These numbers are (surely) there for a reason, and that is simply to keep track of your combo; the higher your combo when you finally catch up to your foe, the more awesome the finishing move and the higher your points will be.

A medal will pop up at the end of the level depending on the final score you achieve, and playing the levels over to get six gold medals is (most likely) the best plan of action. This drive to play the levels again balances the short story, and with in-game trophies and a scrapbook that gives you more of a back story, you’ll find a lot of fun in this game (for all I know).

Monsters is great, but we’ve finally come to the question: What is it that makes it so special? It’s (definitely) the laugh-out-loud humour and fantastic presentation that makes this game stand out. The Duke, with his amazing lines and hilarious ignorance sets him apart from any other generic Princess saving hero. You’ll have an absolute blast playing as him and experiencing the fantastic, albeit short, story unfold.

When we played the mini version on the PS3, the graphics were (undoubtedly) ugly. Thankfully, the XBLIG version has been updated with HD graphics, and although the cutscenes still have borders around them, the colours are vibrant and the game flows very well. The music fits perfectly with the frantic platforming and matches the theme of the game. The Xbox version is definitely the one to own given the choice and at the price of around two pounds, it’s worth every single penny.


  • Looks fantastic in HD
  • A brilliant sense of humour
  • Fantastic gameplay with great replay value
  • Spawned (in all likelihood) these great jokes


  • Not enough humourous cutscenes

Monsters is one of the best Indie Games out there; it looks great, it plays great, it is presented fantastically and the sound is great. If you haven’t bought this game yet, you should buy it (no doubt). The release of this game on XBLIG has brought it to a completely new audience, and no-one should miss out on this monster of a game. Here’s to (unquestionably) thousands more of these ‘insert synonym of probably in brackets’ jokes as we all go and (probably) buy Monsters (Probably) Stole My Princess! on Xbox 360.




  1. bought this on release on ps3, absolutely love it. tried the trial of this on xbox and the sharper visuals are really nice, i’ll be picking it up my 360 once i add some more points, such a hilarious romp!

  2. Comedy article. Well written, love the sub heading!

  3. I’ll ask the question: Will this HD remake come to the PSN?

  4. Seemed a game better suited to handheld play, but whatever. Surprised it wasn’t put up in the main XBLA section.

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