News Snatch: DoA 5 Patched, Racing Rumours Matched, Pinball Plans Hatched

Patch Snatch: A hotfix for Borderlands 2 on all platforms is now live and makes Thermitage from the Sir Hammerlock DLC friendlier. I am not quite sure how, maybe he offers you a nice mug of tea. For further details, click here.

Meanwhile boobs and punching game Dead Or Alive 5 will be patched to Ver.1.03A which will “will address the issue found with Ver.1.03 game play.” Brilliant.


Zen Studios have announced Star Wars Pinball for every format, ever. The first three tables are based on Boba Fett, The Empire Strikes Back and the animated series, The Clone Wars.

Achievements and Trophies are just for fun, right? Wrong! Check out this dude on Channel 9.

“I pick up a lot of chicks at clubs showing my Gamerscore on my phone. Right now, I’m getting more cred and respect from my cheevos, but later I will probably make a lot of money from it.”

Chicks AND money, what more could you ask for.

Its Next-gen Racer Rumour day here at TSA, first we hear whisperings of something from Evolution and now Polygon seem to think that Project Gotham Racing 5 is in the works.

Good news for those in the Defiance PC beta, if you also ticked the box saying you want to playtest the PS3 and Xbox 360 beta then you will also get access to those when they launch.

Borderlands 2 has sold almost six million copies whilst Dead Island has exceeded expectations with five million sales.

The reboot of The Great Giana Sisters, an Amiga and C64 title that slavishly copied Mario is almost upon us and will be released this spring on PS3 and Xbox 360. The new game, Giana Sisters: Twisted Dreams, has ditched the Mario styling and is now a 23 level platformer with “Dreamlike landscapes transform themselves from lush, resplendent surroundings into surreal, withered nightmare worlds, in which there are always new details to discover.”

Scandal of the Day: PS3 and PC players are rather miffed with Activision and Treyarch. Again. Activision has announced an official tournament for Call of Duty: Black Ops 2 and there is a whopping $1,000,000 up for grabs… if you play the Xbox version.

The event is sponsored by, yup you guessed it, Microsoft Xbox 360 and the rules state you must be an Xbox gamer and a COD Elite member.

And that’s it for today, not much of interest going on at all. What a dull post, if we had a video of Kris dancing at last years EGX then I would post it here to fill space but we don’t – it was recorded but has never been seen so I will just have to use the one from the 2011 show.



  1. “Activision has announced an official tournament for Call of Duty: Black Ops 2 and there is a whopping $1,000,000 up for grabs… if you play the Xbox version.”

    It is for this very reason that I’ve sworn off buying any more Call of Duty games. PS3 and PC are continually screwed out of things like this because Activision is deep in Microsoft’s pocket. Not one more penny will they see from me.

  2. WTF seriously. That channel 9 thing is mental. The guy is literally off his head. When he talked about Cheevos, I kept thinking of those cheesy crisps you get.

    I love how he seems to believe getting “cheevos” is a way of life.

    • OMG OMG OMG the kickstarter is amazing. Goal $130,000. 3 Backers pledge $232. 0 seconds to go.

      Too funny. And his reply? “I could care less cus I don’t watch my own movies anyway”

      As a side note, when will people learn it’s not could care, it’s couldn’t care.

      • but what if you cared just a little tiny bit, and then you could care less. :)

      • I’m so glad you said this. I’ve been reading could care so many times and never couldn’t care I’d decided I was the one in the wrong even though the other makes no sense!

    • Tuffcub I’m on page 6 now. Thank you so much. This is some of the greatest reading I’ve ever seen on the internet. Fascinating insight!

    • I know it’s wrong to mock the wicked but his profile on there…

      http://www.Cheevos.​com / http://www.bboy360.​com

      I’ve got 95,000 Cheevos and 55,000 MySpace fans. I was also rated 9.5 on hot or not website.

      And go to his BBoy website..

      “BBoy is tranistioning into acting and might be in a reality show soon.”

      Oh oh oh oh.. his breakdance is priceless.!

      Stop laughing TC. Bad TC.

      • Hang on.. “tranistioning” ??!? :)

        Literally collapsed in tears of laughter here.

      • His breakdancing is too good. Also the fact he keeps mentioning “cheevo” earners that have loads as if they are royalty. Too good.

      • Read every comment and bookmarked. This saga is too good to end now. Again Tuff, thank you so much from the bottom of my heart. You have made my day!

      • Just read the enitre thread “It’s very hard to talk to people with less than 20,000 gamerscore. They just don’t understand.”

        Utterly, utterly priceless.

      • From “[gamerscore] would actually look good on a job resume.” Luckily he’s the only one going for the post of World’s Biggest Bell End.

      • That has got to be one of the best things I have ever read in my entire life!! Bookmarked!! Unbelievable lol

      • His calculation that can help you with your self worth: “Points = (Cheevos * 2) + youtube views + social media fans(myspace, facebook) + (breakdance skill leve(1-10) * 50,000)”

        Yes! I have a self-worth of 150,000 points! Although I may be being generous thinking my breakdance skill is 3…

      • Thank you TC for bringing this douchebag into my life. Are you sure it’s legit though and not an elaborate hoax? Having said that I’ve met a few characters like this in my life so they are out there…

      • Having checked out I have to say this must be a hoax. No one could be that cringeworthy….

        How to bring up your achievements in a bar…

        “This is where you have to be really careful about how you brag about your Cheevos. Your first instinct will be to tell someone you meet as your opening line, but don’t do it. Your goal is to have the person, or group ask you if you play video games, or more specifically, Xbox360. That way you don’t come off like you’re trying to brag and they’re requesting the info.

        Here’s an example of what I usually do, to bring up the conversion:

        Bboy360: Hi, nice to meet you.
        Guest: Yeah, very nice to meet someone as good looking as yourself.
        Bboy360: Thanks, so it’s been a crazy year so far, economy is really taking a hit.
        Guest: Yeah, I’m glad I still have a job.
        Bboy360: Yeah, well some industries like Video Games seem to be doing ok.
        Guest: Oh, I’d like to work in video games, because I like playing them. Do you play video games Bboy360?
        (That last sentence is music to my ears. This is when you know you they’ll be looking up to you for the rest of the night)
        Bboy360: Yeah, I like Xbox360. I play it a bit.
        Guest: Oh really, what games do you play?
        Bboy360: Well I have over 50k Cheevos, so as you can tell I’ve mastered many games.
        Guest: Oh wow!!! I only have 5k Cheevos.
        (Guest then asks 20+ questions in awe)”

      • For the sake of humanity, I hope this is a hoax…

  3. that’s no moon, that’s a pinball, er, ball. ^_^

    seriously, wasted opportunity, not making the balls look like death stars. :(

    didn’t the original Giana Sisters game get banned for copying the Mario games a little too slavishly?

    i can see people getting annoyed at the COD comp, but if ms are sponsering it, it’s not surprising it’s xbox only.

    • Agreed, they should be angry at Sony for never doing anything COD related.

  4. In DOA5 they address the issue where you can get the bouncing going by shaking you controller, like ninja gaiden 2 for the ps3 for the female cast. I should buy an extra controller in case I smash my current one on the floor buy accident.

    • yeah, that could be a problem, especially if you only use one hand. ^_^

  5. Star wars pinball!! I pretty much knew it was coming after so e teesing from Zen, but confirmation is great.

  6. Giana Sisters is a surprise – i thought it was some sort of public domain clone of mario and didn’t realise it had been a commercial game in it’s own right. I’m pretty sure i got it free with an Amiga magazine once.

    • If I recall correctly it was on sale for about 3 days before Nintendo sent the lawyers in, but yes it was also given away free a couple of years later on a magazine.

  7. I’m officially creating my own next gen racer rumour – Ridge Racer, there’s always a ridge racer on console launch.

  8. Cheevo’s just like the lynx attract advert.It really works.8)

Comments are now closed for this post.