This is a very special Abridged Too Far to celebrate the landmark number of 20. It is about Heavy Rain so it goes without saying that it features massive spoilers. Please do not read if you do not wish to know the plot of the story. Hopefully you will enjoy it as it’s taken me 10+ hours of work to complete and I think I will actually cry if you don’t. Oh and there a few naughty words.
There was once an architect named Ethan Mars, an FBI agent named Norman Jayden, a journalist named Madison Paige and a private investigator named Scott Shelby. Ethan was depressed even when he was happy, Norman was happy even when he was angry, Madison was indifferent even when she was happy, sad, angry or scared and Scott was asthmatic.
There was also a serial killer named The Origami Killer. His victims were children and his unique selling point (every successful serial killer needs a unique selling point otherwise you get called a copy-cat) was that he drowned them in rain water. He also liked origami and flower arranging – choosing to leave an orchid and an origami figure on the bodies of his victims. He wasn’t as good at origami as he thought:
- To continue as Ethan Mars: Stand up, spin around 3 times and then go to page 2
- To continue as Norman Jayden: Lick your elbow, blink twice and then go to page 3
- To continue as Madison Paige: Kick your dog, pick your toes and then go to page 4
- To continue as Scott Shelby: Get the person next to you to check their back pocket, shout ‘bum feeler’ and then go to page 5