Big week! What with E3 stuff going on all over the place, and TSA getting a great new look to proceedings, I felt it was about time that we let Steven stretch his legs again, so that we can have a nice quiet summer.
That’s the plan, anyway.
Bearded pink Sackface and the hippy that fears normal shoes couldn’t do the Round-Up this week, due to a certain folded paper murderer abusing his power, forcing them to speak to him in Tef’s office. So I, the recently demoted TSA teaboy and head of the crazies, shall do it instead.
Adam’s rounded up the winners from a bunch of competitions this week. The DiRT Showdown, Sniper Elite V2, Zowie Gaming Gear and Max Payne 3 strategy guide winners are all recapped, so check in to see who won!
Then there is the newly announced DiRT Showdown tournament. Death_in_Flamez is in charge on this one, and 16 people can have a go for the win over the 5 weeks that it will run for. There’s no prize for this one, it’s purely for fun and bragging rights. However, Flamez and Origami Killer are going to put together some videos of the action and have a go at commentating them. Should be interesting to see.
Let’s see what you’re been planning to play this week.
The weekly Uncharted 3 meet begins tonight at 7pm, but please don’t try to destroy your PS3 in an attempt to better Drake, as he’s already way ahead of you. Then on Sunday, it’s time to get very dirty and have a showdown with Rimjaw, or perhaps he just wants to play DiRT Showdown instead.
More driving about, as Tonyyeb wants you to join him for a nice drive in the countryside, playing Gran Turismo 5 on Monday. There is another DiRT meet on Monday but it is for DiRT 3 and Cat & Mouse only, made by podcast question thread regular, Youles. Then on Tuesday, yet another DiRT 3 meet from the Junk Boy.
Tef has formed a Resistance on the Vita meet and requires you to join him on Thursday in order to defeat the Chimera. Also on Thursday, Captain Kirk requires help on Battlefield 3 as someone has shot the Enterprise down three times this week. That one’s only open if you have the DLC for BF3, though. Finally, on Friday Youles wants you to wipe each other out on Wipeout 2048, so he can win the race.
There’s probably going to be some more meets created as we go along, like the regular Battlefield 3 meet on Friday, so keep an eye out for those. You can set up your own meet if you have more than 250 TSA points too.
Origami Killer, put that statue back where it belongs!
The staff almost panicked when TSA ran out of tea this week, due to the amount of hardwork they had, as E3 was this week. There’s loads more E3 news that the guys wrote up, which you can catch up on here. There’s too much stuff to even link to! You can also click on Highlights on the main page.
In reviews this week, Nofi reviewed Sony’s Conference, but didn’t give it a score, so you can’t just skip the article. Aran Suddi also reviewed SBK Generations. I wonder if the SBK is something dirty…
The man who is 99% IRN BRU reviewed the Harley Quinn’s Revenge DLC for Batman: Arkham City. I’m told that Kris had to be sedated due to Blair beating him to it.
Kris was sent into a dark corridor filled with steam and a lot of pipes to bring us a preview of Alien: Colonial Marines. I’m told he nearly got TSA banned due to him asking if Batman is in it every 7 minutes. Our man on the ground at E3, Delriach, was able to preview David Cage’s new game, Beyond: Two Souls. We did tell him that it wasn’t a fighting game, but he insisted on going dressed as Raiden from Mortal Kombat.
The Dan Lee previewed a full moon, before we told him to actually give us a preview of Rainbow Moon. Kris asks us if we should preview this game? We say HELL YEAH! So, where is the preview Kris?
A certain 8 Bit Hero was interviewed on a rainy day for last week’s Meet the Reader. The very last Meet the Reader is up tomorrow and I bet it’ll just be a clips show. Why? Because Tef couldn’t be bothered and was mad at Gazzagb for stealing his LBP Vita code. We discovered what you all thought of Mass Effect 3 on WeView verdict, but there wasn’t a WeView this week due to E3 and Kris threatened to resign if he had to do more work than he normally does. Greg also brought us the usual What We Played.
The Podcast guys brought us loads of podcasting this week, as they did one for each of the E3 conferences.
Time to see what has happened behind the gates of the forums. Warning, it smells of cat urine and is not safe for work.
- Colin R asks about Xbox exclusives and if it is worth getting a 360.
- Symp asks what will you be doing whilst you are downloading the PS+ freebies. I know what Origami Killer did, he broke PSN by downloading everything and damaged the back end of the internet.
- Boomshanks is off on an experiment, to see if he can live in the Real World without having a PC to head on TSA with.
- And Elder Mike wants to discuss the new TSA look. If you haven’t noticed the new look then I suggest you get your eyes checked. I can do it for £100 or a jar of biscuits.
There’s loads of other nonsense in there, so definitely go in and have a look for yourself.
No, you are not taking over the round up Origami Killer! GIVE ME THAT BACK!
Anyway, time for the showdown. Kozak won again, beating the Resistance Burning Skies man 3-1, so time to mix it up again. Kozak will go up against… Sephiroth! [Not the sack one, I just liked that image – Tef]
John Kozak
Pros:
- Highly trained, military Special Ops dude.
- Part of a highly trained, Special Ops team.
- He’s in the future, so he’s got all sorts of fancy gizmos, like heads up displays around his gun and stuff. That stuff’s snazzy.
Cons:
- Totally riffing off similar characters.
- Only good enough for the Ghost Recon B-team? Clearly he totally sucks, right?
- I feel like I’ve seen all this before.
Sephiroth
Pros:
- Can destroy a planet.
- Very skilled fighter and considered to be the very best.
- Has an army of Fangirls to rely on.
Cons:
- Can only fly in a circle, due to only having one wing.
- Was defeated by a boy, I’ll bet that was really embarrassing.
- Could destroy a planet and yet he chooses to summon Meteor? So he is not very smart…
That is all for this week, now I’m off to drag OK to the room which has a hybrid of Justin Beiber and Usher in it. Oh, and stay out of my office while I’m gone.
– This week’s post was hastily slapped together like a jigsaw he couldn’t be bothered to do by Steven, and then turned into something slightly legible by me, teflon. You’ll be pleased to hear that Gazza’s back next week!
gazzagb
Steven, I’m sure you get more and more mental each time we let you lose!
Still going for Kozak, with that arsenal and number of gadgets he’d win.
The Lone Steven
This is probably the most tame round up i did. I suspect Tef put something in my tea in order to tame me. *goes to investigate*
parryman
Sephiroth seems to have a disturbingly loyal fanbase.
If Kozak wins, he will get lynched in Tescos by some crazed fanboi armed with a tin of peas.
The Lone Steven
Right, who has punished Origami Killer by forcing him to share this very small office of mine in the basement? I told Tef that i needed a bigger office but no, instead i get to have less room in mine. :( Also, Origami Killer tried to extort Elder Mike. Untill he realised that i was near by. He seems to be scared of me for some reason. Can’t believe the fecker tried to take the round up away from me. Thanks to him, i now have more blood on the office wall and i hate cleaning up the office wall! Also, has anyone seen the community team kettle as Adam is furious that it is missing and i’ve had to sedate him to avoid people getting fired
Sephiroth would win as a generic marine has no chance. He could shoot him, but Sep would just shrug it off.
gaffers101
Got to be Sephiroth for his weeks vote.